Basic Story

Basic Story

◀️ Previous   Gallery   Transcript  ▶️ Next — Episode information 🔽

Director: Jay Chandrasekhar — Writer: Carol Kolb — Aired: April 10, 2014 —Season: Five — Number: Twelve Summary: The Save Greendale Committee learns they did their job too well and now the school is up for sale.

Plot

I am going to randomly select one of your vending machines to see if it can be rocked using human strength enough to tip and crush me. Now, in the U.S., each year, six people die this way, and five of them are insurance appraisers, so I take this very seriously.

— Ronald Mohammad

While finishing up another meeting, the Save Greendale Committee starts to reflect on how much good they have done for the campus. Abed becomes concerned, worried that their complacency is a sure sign that something horrible is about to happen. Dean Pelton interrupts with an announcement, seemingly validating Abed's fears, but it turns out to be nothing more than a warm greeting to the campus. Later, school board members Carl Bladt and Richie Countee unexpectedly show up to Pelton's office. The inebriated pair tells him that there is an insurance appraiser coming tomorrow to evaluate the school. Back in the study room, Abed warily watches his fellow committee members play phone games as he waits for something disastrous to occur. Pelton then suddenly arrives and alerts them to the news about the appraiser.

Richie and Carl are back.

Everyone starts to panic except Jeff, who tries to assure the Dean that there is nothing to worry about since the committee fixed everything wrong with the school. Abed sees this as an opportunity for wacky hijinks and almost gets everyone to go along with him until Jeff steps in. He pulls Abed outside and explains that there is no story for him here; if there were, then it would mean Greendale is in actual trouble, which could lead to there being no more stories. Abed accepts Jeff's explanation and decides to make sure there is no story. Afterwards, Annie is filling out paperwork in the Administration's office when Jeff shows up to put down some roach motels. Behind some cabinets he finds Dean Pelton's mother's wedding ring and returns it to him. Pelton explains he enjoyed wearing it because he always fantasized about settling down someday.

Jeff tells Abed there is no story.

Jeff scoffs at the idea but Annie points out that he has already put down roots since he has a steady job and a place he loves in Greendale. Jeff denies that he cares, only to then ironically reiterate that he believes the appraisal will go well. Meanwhile, Abed is having a meta-crisis trying to avoid being a part of the story. Later outside of the library, Dean Pelton and the rest of the committee welcome the appraiser Ronald Mohammad. As Ronald drones on about his duties, Shirley warns Jeff not to panic but he refuses to admit he is worried. Shirley cautions him not to deny his true feelings but embrace them as they are a source of strength. Ronald then begins his appraisal while at the same time Abed's meta-crisis causes him to start hallucinating. After some time, Ronald eventually reaches the final stage of his appraisal and tests a vending machine to see if it is properly secured.

Ronald Mohammad begins his inspection.

After the machine passes inspection, Carl Bladt and Richie Countee show up. Ronald goes over his findings and informs them that he finds the school to be a valuable property asset. A celebration breaks out but then quickly comes to a halt after Hickey overhears Carl and Richie talk about selling the school. They explain that since there is proof of value for the real estate they can now sell the school to the private sector for a handsome profit. As they leave to discuss the matter further, Abed arrives informing them about the meta-crisis he averted but everyone is too despondent to care. Jeff tries to calm down a hysterical Pelton only for it to sink in that by "saving" Greendale, the Committee actually destroyed it. Some time later, the school is shown to have been purchased by Subway and is slowly being converted into a Sandwich University.

Subway takes over and even the Human Being is replaced by Jared.

Despite the imminent take over of the school by Subway, the Save Greendale Committee has one last meeting in the study room. Annie suggests they launch an online social media campaign to save the school. Her idea is quickly dismissed by Jeff, who tells her that there's nothing more to be done. Before Jeff adjourns the meeting, Chang reveals his allegiance to Subway and mocks the Committee as he departs. Elsewhere, the Subway rep is given a tour of the campus by Carl and Richie. They arrive at Dean Pelton's office only to find him in his underwear crying. As they leave, Annie and Abed arrive to help Pelton pack up his office. As Annie comforts the Dean, Abed notices a picture of the infamous Greendale computer professor Russell Borchert. He finds a scroll hidden behind the picture and unfurls it. A chalky substance is released from the parchment and inhaled by Abed, Pelton, and Annie. They are all shocked when they read its contents.

Abed makes a discovery.

Meanwhile, Jeff is offered a job by the Subway executive to be their new Sandwich Law professor. He heads back to the study room and finds Britta alone at the table listening to her iPod Nano. They start talking about the future, unwilling to admit how much they will miss Greendale. After reminiscing about how this all started with Jeff trying to sleep with her, he is inspired to propose to Britta. Although uncertain, she accepts and they decide to consummate the agreement on the new study table. Before they can secure the doors, Dean Pelton, Annie, and Abed burst into the room. They seem to be under the influence of a narcotic and mention the need for another Committee meeting. They've found a clue about a treasure which could possibly save Greendale. As the trio babble on about this, outside the study room Chang is eavesdropping and learns of their plans.

Chang laughs manically after overhearing their plans and writing it down as "tomato."

End tag

Buzz Hickey and Ian Duncan discover that they might share some history together from Hickey's time in the Army in England.

Recurring themes

Continuity

• Previously:
  • Jeff and Britta reminisce about their first year at Greendale when he formed the group to sleep with her.
  • Dean Pelton mentions having lost his mother's ring during his first week at Greendale, referring to the Pilot episode where he was wearing it, which means he started working at Greendale at the same time when the The Study Group was formed. While it introduces a continuity error (see "Discontinuity" below) it does explain why Pierce didn't recognize the Dean in "Football, Feminism and You," despite having been at Greendale for over a decade.
• Familiar faces:
  • Comedian Michael McDonald of Mad TV fame appears as the appraiser Ronald Mohammad.
  • The Greendale Human Being returns in this episode, last seen in the Season Four episode "Advanced Introduction To Finality."
  • Subway spokesperson Jared Fogle makes an appearance, seemingly taking the place of the Greendale Human Being as the school's new mascot.
  • The Subway rep from the Season Three episode "Digital Exploration of Interior Design" returns.
• First appearance: Russell Borchert, played by Chris Elliot, makes a brief appearance in the form of a portrait hanging on Dean Pelton's wall.
• History lesson:
  • Ian Duncan mentions having family in Scunthorpe, Lincolnshire. He previously mentioned growing up in Islington, London in "Abed's Uncontrollable Christmas." Buzz was stationed in Scunthorpe, where he lost his virginity to Duncan's aunt.
  • Russell Borchert's scandalous history is touched on: he was a computer professor at school as well a genius millionaire who had sex with a computer. Legend has it that he contracted the first computer virus from this and died. A limerick was written about this incident which is known by most Greendale students and faculty (See Running gags subcategory "Rhyme time" below).
• Returning faculty:
  • Greendale school board members Richie Countee and Carl Bladt return. They were last seen in the Season Four episode "Economics of Marine Biology."
• Returning students: Alex "Starburns" Osborne and Leonard.
• School uniform:
  • Chang wore the same shirts in "Cooperative Polygraphy," "Heroic Origins," and "Bondage and Beta Male Sexuality."
  • Dean Pelton again wears the same "Serious Dean" outfit first seen on the show in the Season Three episode "Biology 101."
• School song: The Dave Mathews Band song "Ants Marching" is played again. It was previously heard in the episode "Basic Intergluteal Numismatics."
• This must be the place: Group Study Room F, the lounge, the cafeteria, Dean Pelton's office, Borchert Hall, and Ian Duncan's office are all seen in this episode.
• School supplies:
  • Jeff finds Dean Pelton's former wedding ring which he wore in the Pilot.
  • Britta is shown listening to the used iPod Nano she was bequeathed from Pierce in the Season Five episode "Cooperative Polygraphy." It was foreshadowed in Season One episode "The Art of Discourse" that Britta would be the proud owner of a used iPod Nano in 2014.
  • The Foosball table is seen as Ronald Mohammad tries to pull over the vending machine.
• Middle Eastern Magic 8 Ball:
  • Abed foresees a calm before the storm when the Save Greendale Committee is too content.
  • When the school has been sold to Subway, he says it can be saved by finding buried treasure, which later happens.
• Replay:
  • Abed once again starts obsessing over something, similar to his actions in the Season Two episode "Abed's Uncontrollable Christmas," Season Four episode "History 101," and Season Five episode "Introduction to Teaching."
  • Once again Chang unexpectedly betrays everyone, revealing his allegiance to Subway.
  • While depressed, Dean Pelton again strips to his underwear just like he did in the Season Three episode "Documentary Filmmaking: Redux."
  • As Abed and Annie enter the Dean's office to help him pack, he laments not being able to use his new label-maker to get organized, and makes a label that he sticks to his forehead that reads,

“BAD DEAN”, which he has called himself previously in other times of crisis. (He quickly tears it off when they find the note behind Borchert's portrait.)

• Googly eyes:
  • Dean Pelton mentions wanting to settle down when asked about his wedding band and glances at Jeff. Annie also ogles Jeff more forwardly.
  • Jeff proposes to Britta and they are about to have sex until Dean Pelton, Abed, and Annie interrupt them.
• Discontinuity: Dean Pelton's mention of having lost his ring during his first week at Greendale, which is around the time when The Study Group was formed, contradicts the flashback from "Heroic Origins" where he is distributing flyers with Chang (whom, according to "English as a Second Language," he hired himself) long before the study group enrolled.

Running gags

• Attention students!:
  • At the beginning of the episode, Dean Pelton accidentally clicks on the P.A System and warmly greets the campus.
  • Some time later after Subway purchases the school he again addresses the campus.
• Bueller? Bueller? Bueller?: When Dean Pelton alerts the Committee to the arrival of an insurance appraiser for the school, Abed points at everyone and asks twice "Call to adventure?"
• NOOOOOO!: Abed screams this after he finds himself still in a story.
• Pansexual imp: When Jeff finds the Dean's wedding ring, Annie asks "Who's the lucky..." and doesn't know how to finish the question.
• Rhyme time: Annie, Abed, and Pelton recite the rhyme associated with Russell Borchert:

“Borchert, Borchert, loves computers, more than women's butts or Hooters!”

• Take that, inspector!: Something in the gym apparently needed the intervention of a demonologist.
• That's you: Abed impersonates Shirley's two different voice tones.
• WWBJD: Shirley says there is only one man qualified to appraise insurance and he died two thousand years ago on a cross.

Pop culture references

• Product placement:
  • The businesses T.J. Maxx, Ben & Jerry's, and Marshalls are mentioned.
  • The Subway franchise buys Greendale.
• Shout Out: In a scene after Subway is revealed to be buying the school, a man who looks nearly identical to Jared Fogle, the Subway spokesperson at the time, can be seen giving an autograph on a Subway napkin.
• Use your allusion: Jeff mentions the traumatised Hurricane Katrina dogs.
• Well read: Ronald Mohammad quotes from Dante's "Divine Comedy." (Canto XVII of Paradiso)

Meta references

• Background check:

•The dry eraser board behind Shirley and Annie reads:

“GCC 512/601”

“NOTE TO GREENDALIENS: ALL BOOKS MUST BE RETURNED BEFORE THE RAPTURE (but then RAPTURE is crossed out) END OF THE SEMESTER!”

“THIS SEMESTER MAY BE YOUR LAST CHANCE FOR A SCREEN CAPTURE!”

Next to a blank section is written:

“Add your joke or comment HERE” and underneath the blank section is written

“SUBMIT HERE”

During the same scene, on the blackboard behind Abed and Britta is a jagged zigzag line that straightens, mimicking a heart monitor in a hospital showing the patient flat-lining.

•As Chang is outside the study room eavesdropping on the study group discussing the buried treasure, he scrawls something on his notepad- which turns out to be the word

“TOMATO”. He is also still wearing his hand decorated T shirt which reads,

“I ♡ SUBWAY”

• Everyone's a critic: Jeff says "This inspection is going to be the most boring thing to happen here since Britta dated Troy," referencing the fact that their relationship never really produced any major storylines until they broke up in "Basic Human Anatomy."
• Up against the wall:
  • Abed comes close to breaking the fourth wall several times in this episode...
    • He times how long the Committee is playing their phone apps and says usually a lot more than that happens in thirty minutes, referencing the running time of a usual broadcast for an episode of "Community."
    • After trying to avoid being in a story, Abed turns around and looks straight into the camera as if reacting to having seen it.
  • Both Shirley and Abed parody each other's schtick: "I commented on his commentary. I just drew a circle around Abed, baby." / "I don't think it's nice to pigeonhole people's gimmicks. You hear me, Two-Voice?", Abed referring to Shirley's habit of switching between "nice" and "sassy" voices.

Trivia

A clear poster of Greendale's campus radio station is seen in the hallway when Abed is trying to find a story. The call sign is KQZY 98.6 FM. It appears "Albert" runs the station, it broadcasts on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and students can submit tapes to audition as a DJ. Similar flyers have been visible in other episodes, for example, behind Leonard when he is sitting on a bench talking about why he is in the Greendale commercial in "Documentary Filmmaking: Redux."

Greendale Campus Radio KQZY 98.6 FM.

After Greendale is sold to Subway, Abed is wearing a Dead Alewives shirt. The Dead Alewives were an improv comedy troupe in Milwaukee, WI, of which Dan Harmon and Rob Schrab were members.

Quotes

“And that's Russell Borchert.”— Dean Pelton

“Borchert, Borchert, loved computers more than women's butts or hooters.”— Annie and Abed

“Very mature you two.”— Dean Pelton