You're Already Accepted!
|
— Dr. Patrick Isakson |
Greendale Community College (GCC) is an open-admissions college located Greendale County, Colorado. Founded back in 1974 by Russell Borchert, it is best known for having amongst its alumni the character actor Luis Guzman. While not as prestigious an academic institution as it's rival City College, it's an affordable school which has over 80 different fields of study. The current Dean is Craig Pelton and it's mascot is the "Greendale Human Being". The school's first appearance was in the Season One episode Pilot. |
About
History
“ | Greendale will blow your mind and your body! Won't you get to know us better? | ” |
Greendale was originally an animal rendering plant before the founder (and first Dean ) Russell Borchert turned it into the campus it is today. During the 90's, Dean Bigley ran the school, creating a memorable school commercial which is still sampled in Greendale's current commercial. Under its current administration, headed by Dean Craig Pelton, several new initiatives were instituted to make the school more attractive to prospective students. This included the "No More than 64" incentive in 2008 and the creation of a hedge fund in 2010 to have fewer accidents. The Dean has also promoted ties to their most famous alumni, character-actor Luis Guzman, by dedicating a statue in his honor that is proudly displayed on the campus quad. Greendale has also tried to stay more current by replacing their old school mascot the "Greendale Grizzly" with a more modern representation of the student body, the "Greendale Human Being". Also in 2010 the school logo was updated. A contest was held for the new logo and the winner was submitted anonymously. The new symbol is meant to represent the school as a crossroads for the students which lead them onto other paths in their lives.
Mission
Greendale Community College makes available collegiate level education to adults of all ages, races, and creeds. Greendale prides itself in 5 categories which the school excels at:
- Accessibility
- Affordability
- Air Conditioning
- Awesome New Friends
- A Lot of Classes
Tuition
Greendale introduced the "No More Than 64" promise, which means students will never pay more than $64 per credit hour.
("Note': Frequent Flyer Miles are NOT an acceptable form of payment.)
Academics
Greendale offers over 80 different fields of study exist. Registration and classes are also offered online. Courses include:
Art
- Film ("Introduction to Film")
- Theater ("Conspiracy Theories and Interior Design")
- Dance ("Interpretive Dance")
- Pottery ("Beginner Pottery")
Sciences
- Psychology ("Social Psychology")
- Space simulation ("Basic Rocket Science")
- Biology ("Biology 101")
- Forensics ("Introduction to Teaching")
Sports programs
Along with Academics, Greendale provides both individual and team sports programs. These include:
- Football ("Football, Feminism and You")
- Basketball ("Debate 109")
- Pool ("Physical Education")
- Foosball ("Foosball and Nocturnal Vigilantism")
- Water Polo ("Basic Intergluteal Numismatics")
Specialized training
Greendale Air Conditioning Repair School
(See main article: Greendale Air Conditioning Repair School) An annex to Greendale Community College, the Air Conditioning Repair School is not just a two year trade school but the latest chapter in the history of an A/C Repair fraternity that dates back to the time of the pharaohs. This society started off as lowly servants but eventually gained enough influence to become a secret power in the world. Written in the sacred texts of "The Air Conditioning Repair Manual" that was passed down from the society's original founders, its followers await the coming of a messiah known as "The Truest Repairman". Its first mention was in the Season One episode "Advanced Criminal Law". It made its official debut in the Season Three episode "Biology 101".
Tranny Dance
All Greendale credits are transferable and has a "Six Degrees of Preparation" plan. Every year, the school has a Transfer Dance known as the "Tranny Dance" to say goodbye to transferring students. The school even selects a student to be the "Tranny Queen".
Tour of the school
Student Life
Clubs and Organizations
The following are student groups, clubs, and organizations at Greendale:
- Acoustic Guitar Club
- A/V Department
The A/V Department has an original web series "Community College Chronicles" written and directed by Intro to Filmmaking student Abed Nadir.
- Campus Republicans
- Chess Club
- Cheerleader Club
- Club Club
- Club Club Club
- Collegiate A Capella
- Comedy Night Group
- Debate Team
- Delta Cubes
- Disco Club
- Forensics Club
- Geometry Club
- Glee Club
- Hat Club
- Ice-Breakers Club
- Improv Now Group
- Intramural Sports
- Math Club
- Model United Nations
- Smokers
- Student Government Association
- Student Newspaper
The Greendale Weekly is posted weekly on the school's website.
Annual Paintball
An annual game of Paintball Assassin is usually played near the end of every Spring semester to close out the school year. The 2009 prize was priority registration ("Modern Warfare"), the 2011 prize was $100,000 ("A Fistful of Paintballs") and the 2012 prize was tickets to a touring production of Chicago ("Curriculum Unavailable"). In 2015 the school's administration consultant Frankie Dart put a ban on all paintball contests on campus. This was due to the expensive costs of cleaning up the school after the games were over along with the numerous complaints from the custodial and janitorial departments ("Modern Espionage").
People
Faculty
- Beginer Pottery Marion Holy
- 'Drama/ 'Nicolas Cage: Good or Bad? Professor Sean Garrity
- Statistics Professor Michelle Slater
- Debate Team Coach Professor Whitman
- Anthropology Professor June Bauer, Dr. Ian Duncan (later)
- Spanish Instructor (former) "Señor" Ben Chang
- History Noel Cornwallis
- Biology Marshall Kane
- PEE Coach Jason Chapman
- Opinions Prof. Taylor
- Who Indeed? A critical Analysis of Who's the Boss? Peter Sheffield
- Library Mariah
- Cafeteria Cafeteria lady
- Head Janitor Jerry
- Fundamentals of Law Jeff Winger