Director: Tristram Shapeero — Writer: Dan Harmon — Aired: October 27, 2011 —Season: Three — Number: Five Summary: After a psychology personality test suggests that one of the study group is a homicidal maniac, Britta has each of them to tell a scary story in order to determine who the possible killer might be.
At the insistence of Britta, the study group gathers in Group Study Room F for a pre-party before the real Halloween party. When Jeff arrives, Britta takes him aside and tries to explain the real reason she threw the pre-party: it turns out the results of the anonymous psych tests she had them take a few weeks ago has determined that someone in the group is mentally unbalanced. Jeff believes she "Britta'd" the test results, but she insists she double checked her findings. With Jeff's reluctant assistance, Britta begins the investigation by asking the group to tell scary stories. By analyzing them, she hopes to ferret out who the potential homicidal maniac is.
Troy and Abed doing cosplay!
Britta starts it off by telling a generic story about a couple making out in a car parked in a dark wooded area. They stop their activities when a news announcer on the radio reports that a hook-handed convict escaped from an asylum. The boyfriend leaves the car to have a look outside and runs into the convict who stabs him repeatedly. When Britta asks Abed's opinion of the story, he tells her he found it to be embarrassing. He recounts his own horror story where the couple acts overly logical and takes the necessary precautions to deal with the escaped killer. The others find his story to be just as bland as Britta's, and Annie decides to tell a real horror story.
It was a dark and spooky night in the woods...
A couple was making out when they are interrupted by...
...a radio announcement about an escaped lunatic from a nearby psycho ward.
"That sounds dangerous!"
"Fine, I'll get out and look, but then I'm entitled to sex."
"I'm getting stabbed by his hook hand thing!"
"Oh my God! No! I WAS RIGHT"
Dealing with the killer in a calm rational manner.
Annie tells a story set in the Victorian age of a school teacher who encounters a handsome stranger when stranded in the woods after being thrown from her horse. This stranger supposedly took her back to his cabin to treat her wounds but in reality had a more sinister objective. He reveals himself to be a vampire and at first wanted to have her join his undead concubine. However, he can't seem to make up his mind about whether he wants her to stay or go. Eventually, his thirst for her blood overwhelms him. He is about to attack her when she reveals that she is a werewolf and ends up killing him instead. Annie describes the violence in gory detail much to the dismay of the rest of the study group.
"I am a monster, and I must feed."
"I'm fine with this."
"Wait! Teach me to read."
"Oh reason not the need! Our basest beggars are in the poorest things superfluous!"
"Your porcelain neck in the light of the full moon...too appetizing."
"I'm a werewolf that feeds on selfish vampires!"
I'm a die by werewolf!
Shocked by her story, Britta believes she may have found her suspect and starts to question Annie. Jealous of the attention Britta is giving her, Troy decides to tell a horror story of his own. He tells the tale of two fighter pilots who crash-land near an old scientist's cabin. The scientist drugs them both and experiments on them. He awakens them and gleefully tells them they've been sewn together. Unexpectedly, the experiment results in the duo being given mind powers which they use to beat the scientist unconscious. Some time later, the pilots revive him and reveal that they experimented on the scientist too. They took his butt and put it on his chest, in essence giving him the appearance of boobs. To torment him further, they also switched his hands with his feet, so he couldn't fondle them.
Troy and Abed sewn together.
Abed ends up being the only one who enjoyed the story while Pierce is annoyed as he rightly assumed the crazy old scientist was meant to represent him. Pierce offers his own tale about a character he calls Magnum that he later admits is an idealized version of himself. He succeeds in frightening the study group with it although this is mainly due to its offensive sexist and racist themes and not because of any horror aspect. Annie suggests that the stories are starting to become too personal as the bimbos in Pierce's narrative were the women of the study group and the stereotypical hoodlums he beat up were meant to be Troy and Abed. Shirley agrees and laments the overuse of violence in the last few tales.
Call him Magnum.
Shirley launches into her own story describing a group of friends decadently partying in a cabin. A radio announcement interrupts their debauchery and informs them it's the "End of Days, when all the good people are called up to heaven while the bad ones are left behind on Earth. The Devil arrives to claim the friends and take them to Hell. A friend of the partyers, a devout Christian, makes a dramatic appearance and banishes the Devil. The friends thank her and ask her if they can accompany her to Heaven, but she says she can't and just came to say goodbye. When she departs, the Devil reappears with a chainsaw and repeatedly chops up the friends for all eternity.
You can sneak us in, right?
Shirley's sermonizing brings the storytelling to an end and prompts the others to try to leave for the real Halloween party. They are stopped by Britta and Jeff, and she comes clean about the personality test results and why she wanted them to tell spooky stories. The rest of the group refuses to believe one of them could be a psycho, but Britta insists that they need to figure it out. She goes on to explain what might happen if that unbalanced person is left unchecked. The horrific details causes the study group, including Jeff, to back away from her. They remind her that she took the test too which causes Britta to consider the possibility that she might be the psycho. The lights then suddenly go out and when they come back on everyone is armed.
Troy and Abed get axe mur-dered!
Annie and Shirley stabbed.
Jeff and Pierce posioned.
The killer revealed?
Jeff tries to defuse the situation by telling another story about friends who form a bond with a hook handed psycho. The group dismiss the story as nonsense and question Jeff's sanity. This makes him admit to randomly filling out his answers and causes Annie to scrutinize the test sheets. She points out that Britta had run the tests backwards in the scoring machine. Embarrassed, Britta runs the tests again and the results are reversed: only one of them is sane while the rest are crazy. Shirley suggests they not try to figure out who the tests belong to; this way they can all believe that they are the sole sane one. Everyone agrees and as they leave for the party the camera pans back to the tests where it's revealed to the audience that Abed was the sane one.
Jeff attempts to calm things down with a story...
A hook handed psycho interrupts a gathering of friends.
"Tell us why you kill people!"
"Fear. I kill because I'm afraid. Can I get a hug?"
A group hug resolves everything. The end.
Starting from the center and moving left to right, the sanest to the craziest.
Annie's Boobs: Annie's teacher dress has a very low-cut front.
Awww!: In Jeff's horror story, Chang is revealed to be the psycho who says all he wants is a hug. His request elicits "Awwws!" from the study group who join Chang in a group hug.
Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice!: For the third time on the show, the movie Beetlejuice is referenced, this time by Annie. Following the rules in the movie, Betelgeuse suddenly appears in the background.
Britta'd: The study group has taken to using Britta's name as a verb, essentially meaning 'to screw something up.