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Staff/Faculty ID
Portrayed by: MAITE SHWARTZ
First appearance: Early 21st Century Romanticism
Date of birth: UNKNOWN
Department: LIBRARY

I wanna be a book. She could pick me up, flip through my pages, make sure nobody drew wieners in me.
Troy talking about Mariah, "Early 21st Century Romanticism"

Mariah was a librarian at Greendale Community College. She caught the eye of both Troy and Abed who decided to respectfully compete for her affections. Her first and so far only appearance was in the Season Two episode "Early 21st Century Romanticism". She is portrayed by actress Maite Shwartz.


In February of the study group's second year at Greendale, Troy and Abed found themselves both attracted to the school librarian Mariah. They would spend more time at the library just to look at her while hiding behind their Anthropology text books. The stalking got to the point where Abed suggested they make a lot of noise just so that she would shush them. With the Valentine's Dance approaching, they both wanted to take her to the event but were conflicted about which one should ask her. Eventually the duo finally mustered up enough courage to speak to her approaching her with a briefcase and a proposal. They explain how they are best friends and in the interest of protecting that friendship they decided to ask her at the same time. Mariah was flattered and admitted that this was the cutest thing that ever happened to her. However, she was unable to choose as she didn't know either one of them.

Troy and Abed conferred for a bit before returning with a new proposal. They ask that she attend the Valentine's Day dance with both of them and get to know them better, then she can decide which one she would rather be with. Mariah happily agrees to this and then becomes curious about what was in the briefcase. She is amused to find out it's filled with tacos Troy and Abed planned on eating later. The night of the Valentine's Day Dance, Abed and Troy are respectfully presenting to Mariah their arguments to her as to whom she should pick over the other. Abed told her about all the premium movie channels he had from HBO to Starz. For his part Troy showed off a few impressive dance moves as Abed cheered him on. Later Abed gave Mariah his analysis of the "Saw" movie franchise. With both of their "presentations" over, Abed asks if she had decided who to choose. In response she sends Abed off to get them all some punch.

She tells Troy that they are cute together and starts to apologize for her choice. Troy assures her that they will be fine with whoever she chooses as they were the ones who suggested this in the first place. Mariah then tells Troy that she chose him just as Abed returns with their drinks. Troy breaks the news to Abed who accepts the decision with aplomb thanking Mariah and wishing the two a good night. Later, Mariah is slow dancing with a troubled Troy who bluntly asks her what was wrong with Abed. She told him she was a bit put off by his love of films and that while she would love to be his friend, romantically she finds him to be too weird. Troy immediately leaves her on the dance floor angered by her opinion of Abed. As she exits the cafeteria where the dance is being held, she walks by Troy who is hugging Abed. Troy loudly tells his best friend to ignore her and she sheepishly walks past the two of them as they continue their embrace.


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